CHRISTMAS COOKIE RECIPE

At this time of year, we need all the help we can get...this recipe might be just the ticket....
CHRISTMAS COOKIES (these are good)
1 cup water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup sugar
pinch salt
1 cup brown sugar
squeeze of one lemon
4 large eggs
2 cups  dried fruit
1 cup or more of Napoleon Brandy

Sample Brandy to establish quality.
Take a large bowl, check Brandy again, to be sure it is of the highest quality.
Pour one level cup and drink.Turn on the electric mixer
Beat one cup of butter in a  large, fluffy bowl. Add 1 tsp of sugar, beat again.
At this point it's best to make sure the Brandy is still okay. If it was  good for Napoleon.....
Turn off the mixerer thingy majig.Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl, adn chuck  in the cup of dried fruit. Pick  up the  excess fruit off the floor.
Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the Brandy-Wandy to check for tonsisticity.
Next, sift two cups of salt, or something-er-other.
Check the Brandy-Boo....
Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find at this point.
Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees, and try not to all over. Don't forget to beat off the turner.....
Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Napoleon Brandy ( vive la resistance! Make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

Cherry Mismas!